Proverbs 22:6, Proverbs 29:17, Ephesians 5:22-26, Ephesians 6:1-6, Colossians 3:18, Colossians 4:1, 1st Peter 3:6, 1st John 4:7.
A christian home is a place where husband and wife live with their children and sometimes without children. A christian home is where Bible is loved and taught, where the master's will is sought, where the husband/father as the head of the home is true and strong; where the wife/mother is loving, caring and submissive; where the children are led to know Christ; where the family altar fire burns and glows; where the Lord is honoured and served; where the children obey their parents. Every couple should desire a Christian home.
After wedding, husband and wife begin to live together as one in peace, harmony and unity. They need wisdom, understanding, perseverance and unconditional love for the home to stand. God should be number one in such a home; things must be done together, decision must be taken together and there should be no room for falsehood. Since a home is made of members and each member has roles to play.
I will highlight some of the roles of each member:
ROLES OF THE HUSBAND
The husband, also as father and as head (Ephesians 5:23): he is the physical head of the family. He should love his wife as Jesus loves the church. (Ephesian 5:25). Husbands love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself to it. 1st Peter 3:7. Ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life that your prayers be not hindered. Love your wife as you love your own body and love unconditionally. Ephesians 5:28-29.
As a father (Ephesians 6:4); ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath but bring them up in the fear of the Lord. As a master, if you have servants (Corinthians 4:1): give unto your servants that which is just and equal; knowing that ye also have a master in heaven. Do not maltreat your servants, pay their wages on time.
ROLES OF A WIFE
Ephesians 5:22-25. Submit yourself unto your own husband as unto the Lord; therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Wives, submit yourself unto your own husband, as it is fit in the Lord (1 Peter 3:6a) even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, whose daughters ye are (Prov 4:1). Every wise woman buildeth her house but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. So be a wise woman. You should do your husband good not evil. If you are submissive and obedient, your husband will have confidence in you.
A wife is a mother to her children, boosts the morale of her children and develops intimacy with them. She also plays the role of a counselor to them. She manages the family finances, supervises the growth of her children. She speaks with wisdom, she is not idle; she has self control and fears the Lord. When you are loaded with all these good virtues, you are priceless.
It is the responsibility of parents to train up their children in the way of the Lord so that when they are old, they will not depart from it: correct them, and they shall give thee rest and give delight unto your soul.
ROLES OF CHILDREN
Ephesians 6:1-3. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honour thy father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise, that it may be well with thee and thou mayest live long on the earth. (Colossians 3:18).
Children should note this, that disobedience and dishonouring parents are not of God. Obey elders as you do to your parents, give respect to them and obey the laws and rules of the land as well. Be a source of joy to your parents. You are part of the success story of a home. So play your own part. Do not forget that whatever you sow, you shall reap. A child today is a mother or father tomorrow. Be a kingdom child. You are not a product of mistake but a child of destiny.
ROLES OF SERVANTS/STEWARDS
Ephesians 6:5-6). Servants/stewards are to be obedient to their masters. Do your work as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart. Avoid eye service and note that whatsoever good thing you do, the same you will receive of the Lord. A servant today may become a master tomorrow.
Every member in the home must show love all the time. 1 John 4:7 - Beloved, let us love one another for love is of God, and every one that loveth is born of God and knoweth God.
In case there is a delay of fruit of the womb, it may be a test of your faith. But do not forget Sarah and Hannah had same and God eventually opened their wombs. Hannah prayed, so you too can do same. In case the children are of the same sex, you should not hold your spouse responsible. God gives what you need. Be grateful to Him for the gift. The most important thing is to bring them up in the way of the Lord.
As you grow old as husband and wife, there will be changes due to old age. Beauty will be fading, strength of the man or woman wanes with time, appetite changes considerably, sexual excitement may reduce, children will be moving out to start their own family life. You should be prepared to adapt to the changes. A happy christian home is a product of the contribution of all the members of the family. Play your own part very well.
The home should be a place of shelter for the members of the family, where each member will love and be willing to come back to. Sow the seed of prayer into your life and that of the children. Control the affairs of your home with prayers.
May the Lord grant you the grace to love as Jesus loves the church. May He endow you with wisdom and knowledge you need to be able to accommodate other members to build a truly Christian home in Jesus name. Amen